Bid now for the 'Creepy Insane Evil Wicked Haunted Clown'

Forget buying old toys or comics on Ebay. The latest fad is selling haunted items.

I'd read about it in the Fortean Times this month and then the spooky guys over at The Mystery of the Haunted Vampire posted a link to the following auction. You too can be the owner of a 'Creepy Insane Evil Wicked Haunted Clown.'


At the point of posting the demonic toy was going for $10.50 and should be avoided by anyone suffering with Coulrophobia.

And it would appear that the Creepy Coco isn't the only eerie auction found at ebay. The most infamous one of late is the haunted Disney Stitch Cuddly Toy auctioned by Garbageguy2. This story is a work of genius. After a trip to Disneyland to buy a load of Lilo & Stitch toys he stops off at a dingy restaurant and finds another Stitch toy which he buys for his fiancee.

Nothing odd there. Until the following stuff starts happening:

They wake up each morning to find all the other cuddly toys stored on their TV stand scattered all over the floor except for the restaurant-bought Stitch sitting there defiantly all on its own.

Freaked, the Garbageguy2 throws the toy away and it trundles off in the garbage truck only to reappear on the toy shelf later that day even though all the doors in the house had been locked. Wooooo! Spooky!

So they take it to a landfill site and bury it. Nothing is heard for three weeks until they find their dog, unconscious in the garden. The Stitch toy is laying beside his body.

No more mr nice guy then. They try to burn it, but it won't light. They pour lighter fluid over it but it absorbs the fluid, remaining dry.

Getting frantic now, they cut it into six pieces and dump it outside. The next morning it is back on the shelf, mysterious restored to its pre-scissor frenzy condition.

Not sure what to do next they leave it in a charity store. It appears on their front doorstep two days later.

And so, terrified out of their wits they do the only rational thing when you're being stalked by a possessed cuddly toy - they pop it up on Ebay and sell it for $212.

My favourite line on the item description? "We also cannot guarantee that the item will stay with you after you have received it. If it stays as persistent as it has previously, it may try to get back to us. I will not be putting a return address on the package, as if when you realize that the item is evil, as I'm sure you will, I do not want you sending it back to us. It will become your responsibility as soon as it enters your possession."

So we must pity the poor soul who has purchased such an evil and demonic cuddly toy. Because their life is about to be turned upside down? No, because they've just shelled out over 200 bucks on such an obvious hoax. Madness.

Now if you'll excuse me I need a holiday and so I'm off to try and sell the haunted Uncle Bulgaria doll that is sitting on our kitchen shelves. I'm sure it's been looking at me funny...