Smoking may blow up your loo

Forget those 'Smokers die younger' warnings on packets of cigarettes. What you need is a 'Smoking may cause you to explode" sticker.

Actually for once the sin doesn't lay at the tobacco manufacturers door just someone who is - how can I put this nicely - stupid. You see last Tuesday a chap decided he needed to spend some quality time in a portable loo in Blacksville W. Va, USA. Nothing newsworthy in that until the guy, who at the moment hasn't been named, lit up. Unfortunately he was sitting slap bang in the middle of methane gas build-up and, according to a spokeswoman for Monongalia Emergency Medical Services, the volatile gas 'didn't take to kindly' to the Marlboro. The result? Why the portable karzy exploded of course.
Luckily the unfortunate smoker wasn't severely injured and drove himself to Clay-Battelle Community Health Center. But just imagine the therapist bills he's going to have to shell out for now every time he wants a dump. You hear of drivers that can't get back in a car after a nasty crash. Imagine being reminded of the time where you were blown out of a porta-loo every time you hear the call of nature. Toilet-trauma at its worst.