Ban the bowl

Do you think some town councils have too much time on their hands? Recently, a town in Italy called Monza has made it illegal to keep goldfish in bowls. According to Giampietro Mosca, one of the council officials: "A fish kept in a bowl has a distorted view of reality and suffers because of this."

But surely a fish forgets reality within seconds anyway? If they don't I'm troubled now. What about the fish I had when I was a kid. Did Flipper suffer and was Moby Dick sent doo-lally from having a round-bowl? And what about the trio of Jaws, Jaws 2 and Jaws 3D? I thought they were happy but all the time they must have felt that they were constantly having a bad trip.

So I'm sorry my little fishes of my youth. I didn't realise I was being cruel and so I apologise now. I hope that you're happy in that big aquarium in the sky.